It's November already?

A LONG time has passed since my last blog entry - and I probably could type forever and ever on this one to catch you up on all the exciting changes we've had since I last posted (in June...).
Girls - you have grown and changed incredibly over the last 4 months. We are living in a new state now, and you have new friends and family members are a part of your daily lives here in our new home. In hindsight it was the best decision we could have made (to move). I look back on the way that we were working, surviving, living, and it just was not as productive and enjoyable as our lives here in Tahoe. Everyone here operates on what we call "Tahoe Time"....they move slower, respond to e-mails after a few days (rather than a few minutes), they don't honk at you or flip you off on an hour and a half long commute. People here are just happier with their lives, and they produce that feeling in the community as well. There is not as much competition for career "laddering" and definitely not as much wealth and ignorance. Aside from the changes in the people - there are absolutely NO cats here. I think I've seen two in the past 4 months. I know why nobody has cats here - I always lost many of mine as a little girl growing up here, so I think it's best that Satchmo and ZZ are living in Oregon with your Grandma Mary. They are our family members whom got "left behind" in the move. We knew that they wouldn't make it very long here, and I'm thankful that they are living their happy cat lives with someone who has more time to love them. Harper, you haven't ONCE mentioned our old cats, and have never asked me what happened to them. I don't think you were that fond of them anyway.  This is just a few of the many things that have changed in our lives over the past few months. It's funny that I focused on the cats there for a few minutes......this is supposed to be about you girls!


As I said - this could go on and on and on - but I'll try to get back to the "five things about you" that I initially intended with this blog.
Harper - you are becoming quite the little girl, and we have noticed that over the past few months you've grown out of your "toddlerhood". Your language and motor skills are rapidly developing and you are SO DANG SMART. I know. I know. Every parent says that about their child. But you really are incredibly accurate, question abstract concepts, are starting to write letters (you've been writing "H" for a few months now), recognize all of your letters and are starting to recognize numbers (have been counting to 20 for about 6 months now), you understand the sun vs. the moon (day/night), that you can cast a shadow (and you even say "I cast a shadow mama...YOOK!"), and know all of your letter sounds.  You recognize strange animals that some adults don't even know about, and you talk about environments and where things live and why. It's super interesting to me the way that you process information and retain it almost immediately.  I know all kids do this, but it just seems to happen really rapidly for you. 
You are POTTY TRAINING!!! This is a HUGE accomplishment, and I actually didn't think you were ready. We gave you about 2 days in "big girl underwear" and you HATE having pee on your legs and feet enough to make you try and sit on the potty more.  You are really anxious about it though and you run around in circles for a few minutes until you're actually ready to sit down and try.  We have had very few accidents and we are all SO proud of you. I'm amazed at how easy it's been and I am really looking forward to not having to buy diapers for you anymore. Having two kids in diapers is EXPENSIVE (probably close to $150 a month, just so that when you look back on this in 50 years you can chuckle at the price). 
You are sleeping in a "big girl" bed ( a toddler bed )...we moved you out of your crib a few months ago (September I think). You have done marvelously and the only downfall is that we had to put a child lock on the inside of your door because you were freely wandering around the house in the middle of the night. We tried to move Zoie into your room, which you were great about and welcomed her happily.  Unfortunately she was still screaming all night and you weren't able to get any sleep. You keep asking me when Zoie will come back to sleep in your room, so I'm looking forward to that day as much as you are.  
You are hiking and "biking" everywhere and you love it. We have truly savored every morning and afternoon that Tahoe brought us this summer and fall. We got you a PlasmaCar which is a low-to-the-ground car that is self-propelled by rocking the steering wheel back and forth. You can also push with your feet to move forward and back. It's red, and you LOVE it. You love to take it on the bike trail up by Grammie's house and you actually go really far on that thing. The first time I took you we made it about halfway through the trail (1/8 mile each way)....and you rode the whole entire time. You also have started to love to hike and you are getting better about continuing to hike up a trail rather then stop every 2 feet to look at a rock or some pineneedles on the ground. We put Zoie in the baby backpack and it's great to have you hiking along side of us. I have dreams that someday we'll be able to backpack the length of the Pacific Crest Trail as a family.  Most likely though by the time you're old enough to do that with us - you won't want to because it won't be "cool". Your dad and I have always wanted to make that trip....Mexico to Canada along the Sierras.
And I think lastly - your fifth thing Harper - I think I'll choose your relationship with your Grammie & Grandpa. You have quickly grown to absolutely adore them, and will stop anything to go and play at their house or see them. You squeal and laugh and drop on the floor wiggling when either one of them walks through the door. You also love love love your "Untle" Ben and Auntie "Towee" (Kori) and have even become pretty comfortable with dogs around their giant white dog Blanca. You ask about them all the time and whether or not Blanca is there. That right there is the number one reason why we moved back to Tahoe -  so that you and your sister can have these relationships with these people. And for them to be close relationships. You are loving the nights that you go to Grammie & Grandpa's house - which means it is SO QUIET around our house...and your dad and I finally get a little break! Never would have/could have happened in Seattle, we just didn't have enough "people".  I am so glad that you are able to have fun with Grammie and Grandpa and Uncle Ben on a weekly basis - it is the best sight ever to see you melt for them. And little do you know how you are melting their hearts at the same time.  We all love you Harper - so much.

Zoie. Oh Zoie. Where do I even begin with you? Five things since June? Are you kidding me? Just as with your sister, there are many things I should write about. But you have had a monumental past few months.  I guess I'll start with the "big" things and go from there.
First and foremost - you're walking! You started walking exactly 7 days before your first birthday. You took about 1 week to get steady and then you were off toddling around with confidence. You wear all of the little Converse tennis shoes that your sister wore when she learned to walk, and are doing great. Your little feet are smaller though so we are having the darndest time finding snow boots to fit you. I'm sure that with the powers of the internet I'll find a pair somewhere. Anyhow - we really should have dressed you as a zombie for Halloween because you have the zombie walk perfected right now - arms straight out in front of you, mumbling and drooling walking stiff-legged down the hallway. It's perfect zombie baby form - I really should still dress you up that way just for the pictures.
You are now the official owner of 8 big teeth (sharp as razors)  - but you still haven't gotten any better about cutting them. You are just miserable when they are coming through your gums, and I don't blame you one bit. I'm sure it's horribly painful. You are eating 100% table food and are actually pretty picky - so we're having a tough time finding foods you'll eat other than fruits, yogurt, and pastas. Your sister is the same though - both of you are pretty tough to please at the table. You are FINALLY done nursing, and really only stopped because I refused it to you as soon as you turned 1....little stinker...you were waiting all day while I was at work and still refusing a bottle from Grammie or daddy. Finally now though you will drink up to 8 oz. from the bottle, and from me nonetheless. This is by far one of the hugest progressions you've made - considering you have sternly refused the bottle since your first week of life, and we have continually offered it to you week after week.  The funny thing is though that you don't seem to be lactose intolerant like your sister, and can drink whole milk, but you prefer soy milk anyway. That means between you and your sister we are going through about 1 case of soymilk (Costco sized case) each week. That's a lot of little soy beans you're drinkin'.
Let's see...what else....oh yeah! You turned 1 last month!!  Woo HOO we finally made it through our first year with two under two. It was a whirwind to say the least, and you're had SO MANY ups and downs, but you finally had 12 months pass you by and accomplished the feat of being able to eat peanut butter and honey, among other things that 1 year olds get to eat. (Even though we gave you peanut butter at 10 months...you survived). We had a great first birthday BBQ for you (on your birthday even!) and a whole bunch of our friends and family came over for the afternoon/evening. I made you a super cute cake and even made you your own little "smash" cake. All the older kids at the party gathered around your high chair and dipped their fingers into the frosting to show you what to do - it was hilarious. You finally caught on and got your fingers messy and finally started shoving it in your mouth. It made for a perfect 1st birthday evening and you got to play play play your little heart out with all of the kids who came over (Dexter, Seth, Julia, Izzy, and JJ, and your sister of course!).

I'm not going to go into it, because I'm sure it will jinx me - but you're pretty much sleeping through the night - as soon as you started taking the bottle and drinking 6-8oz. you've slept through the night a few times. 12 months later....and you're finally making progress! 
And I think finally - your fifth "thing" Zoie....is that you're finally mellowing out a little bit and you aren't so fussy. With walking and taking a bottle I'm beginning to think that you've been starving for food and mobility for the past 12 months. You are just so much happier now that you're doing those new things - and it is gradually making our lives a bit happier. You aren't as fussy every second of every day, and you actually get down and toddle around the house quite a bit on your own. You like to check in and come cuddle with me for a few minutes every time you see me - but you are doing much better at playing on your own.

We finally had to hire a nanny - she is helping us out 2 out of the 3 days that I'm at work - she's fabulous - we love her. And most importantly you girls both love her too! Everyone is doing great with our new care giver, and we're finally adapting to a situation that we never  thought we would do (nannying). There just aren't many feasible childcare options in our new neck of the woods, and this is one of the only ones. It's turning out pretty well though, and Harper you ask about "Bamanda" all the time (her name is Amanda...so you're close), which just shows us that she's doing a great job connecting with you.

Alright - I've had enough typing, and it's time to start thinking about what to make for dinner. I'll try to journal again sooner than 4 months from now....as I'm sure we'll have new developments each week. I'll even try to add some pictures too!

Smile girls - your mama LOVES LOVES LOVES you :)

Big changes on the horizon

Has it really been over a month since I last posted? Oh my goodness! The sun started coming out occasionally and I think we've been spending more time outside, which means nap times are becoming my only time to catch up on laundry and cleaning. Plus, we have been super busy planning the next big chapter in our lives: a move back to California.

We have finally made the decision to move back to our home state. After 9 long years in Seattle we have come to know the Pacific Northwest as home and I am desperately clinging to every last moment and friendship that I have here. I flew down to Tahoe to interview for a job, which in turn I quickly got and we had to make the decision to stay or go.  Going means leaving on July 9th, which is less than three weeks away.  We made the ultimate decision about 2 weeks ago and then I think we just sat in shock for a few days. The next week I mulled and mulled about telling our friends here that we were actually going to move. These conversations have all been difficult, heartbreaking, and I think every time I tell someone I feel guilty and want to take-back my decision. I want to stay. I want to go. Maybe we should stay. Maybe we should go. That's it. We're going. *sigh* We've informed the landlord, who is showing our apartment, so I've had to keep it super clean and we have had to leave for a few hours at a time while he shows it. This is inconvenient but necessary in order to leave on good terms with him and hopefully get some of our deposit back. We've reserved the rental truck, booked one-way flights for me and the girls (much to my disappointment of not getting to drive, I really want to drive!), put "for sale" signs on the truck (also much to my disappointment, but necessary), and we have our fingers crossed that Dave has almost secured a job at Northstar.  We still have not found a place to live. We still do not have enough money to make the move and pay for deposits and rent.....BUT, we are figuring out the last bits and I'm sure that we'll make it by the skin of our teeth. As always.

I am so happy for you girls that you will get to see your Grammie and Grandpa, and Uncle Ben & Kori. It will be the most exciting place for you to grow up, I promise. Seattle would also be a very exciting place to grow up, but we're hoping that Tahoe will be safer, smaller and will provide you with everything you need. Someday when you are in your 20's you will understand how special it is that you got to grow up in the Tahoe basin. You may even understand much sooner than that, as I know me and my friends all did....but ya never know, you could hate us for making you grow up outside of a city in a small town. 

A lot has happened with you two over the past month. Zoie, you are a teething maniac and are cutting all four top teeth right now...all at the same time. You have been miserable for weeks, and despite that we can see them poking out of your gums they are still bothering you quite a bit. You also started to crawl yesterday! About 7 days ago you figured out how to rock onto your hands and knees from a sitting position, and you wobbled for the past week, but all of the sudden yesterday you picked up one shaky arm and one shaky leg and moved them in sequence! It's like watching a baby animal learn to walk for the first time, or a caveman or something...all wobbly and shaky, but moving like a little snail you push forward. It's so dang cute, and hilarious! I will try to catch more of it on video tonight. You are still refusing a bottle, which is going to be really tough in a few weeks when I have to go back to work! You get so mad when you see the bottle, it makes you cry just looking at it. You are so stubborn it's amazing you aren't a little Taurus yourself.  You are such a funny girl though - you love to laugh at your sister and you love to have scarfs and things put over your head for a game of peek-a-boo. When I flew down to Tahoe for the job interview you had a great little trip and absolutely loved Auntie Kori and her giant white dog Blanca Blu. Your sister HATES dogs, but you think they are pretty funny and are always excited to grab a handful of fur.

Harper you are becoming such a polite little girl. You say "Tank you mama" almost every time I get something for you or give you food or drink. You are just starting to say "TuseZoie....we'll see how long this transition takes. Such a happy thought to imagine the two of you sleeping in a room together peacefully -  through the whole night. Another *sigh*. This move will be the perfect time to make a few changes in our lives, many big many small, and for you, this will mean a lot of BIG things. Going back to school and making new friends! Having time with grammie and grampa whenever you want it, and being able to play outside in the woods of Tahoe! Such an exciting time ahead for you my little peanut, I can't wait for you to learn how wonderful it all will be.

Well - "Where are you mama?" is being called from your bedroom, so I have to sign off for now. I'll try not to make it so long in between posts this time.

Smile girls, your mama loves you :)

Harper turned 2! Woo hoo!

I haven't updated in a few weeks, so sorry folks. We were super busy preparing for Harper to turn 2 years old! I hand made all of the invitations and decorations for her party so I have been a busy crafty mama.

Harper, I cannot believe that two years have gone by since the day you were born. I remember you coming into the world early in the morning (6:52am to be precise) so tiny and fragile. Now you are a rough & tumble 25 pound "big" girl, and you even tell me "uchgh, so heaby" when you give me a hug now (repeating what I would say, Ugh, you're getting so heavy!). It's the cutest thing, the way that you imitate my sarcasm almost to a tee. We celebrated on your actual birthday (which was a Monday) by me asking you all day what you wanted to do or eat, and you responding with "watch Elmo?" and "goldfish!". Then daddy stopped and picked up three yummy gourmet cupcakes at the market on the way home and we put in two candles and sang to you after dinner. You had no idea what to do with the candles, and daddy ended up blowing them out for you. You also didn't care one bit about the cupcake - you just picked the rainbow colored sprinkles off the top of the frosting and then called it off - screaming "I want to take a BAFF!!" (bath) We had a small party for you this past weekend on Saturday and a few of your little kid friends came over, the rest were adults & a few of your old teachers from school. You had a BLAST.  We even practiced blowing out birthday candles the day prior, so at your party it was a complete success! You loved opening presents and playing with the balloons that daddy brought home. We had a great little 2nd birthday party, and I hope that when you're older, you'll have some glimmer of a memory of it. Like....I remember my mom making this awesome Curious George cake that had polka dots all over it and actually had rainbow cake colors swirled inside. I remember strange things like that from my childhood birthday parties - what my mom baked, or where in the house we all set up our sleeping bags for the slumber party.  Two may be young to remember memories, but I still hope that you will someday.

Zoie, you were a little trooper during the whole party, you just had to be in my arms most of the time. We're starting to realize how "stranger" anxious you are, when your sister definitely never had issues with other people being near or holding her.  Zoie, you just haven't had that kind of exposure to other people, so you're glued to one of us all the time. You cut your second bottom tooth at the beginning of May (right when you turned 7 months actually) - and it's started to peek up above your gum line next to it's neighbor. You are definitely a miserable teether though, and I wish we knew a way to help you get some relief. You are FINALLY sleeping a bit better. We spent a horrible week teaching you to sleep on your tummy & unswaddled, but it seems to be paying off.  Last night you only woke up one time at around 3:30 for a feed.  That was the first night in your entire life that you have slept that long in one period.  It was awesome, and let me tell you how much better your mama feels when I get that much sleep. A whole 8 hours, with only one brief interruption! WOO HOOO!!!  That was wonderful. Now let's do it again tonight and every night thereafter until you're done nursing and can make it all the way through the night.....we are all ready to sleep such long hours again!

So. Tired.

It's been more than a week - I'm sorry. I'm just. so. tired.
Zoie has gone back to being awake between 1:30/2ish and about 5/5:30 am.  It's a horribly long stretch in the middle of the night. By the time I finally get her down again I'm wide awake, starving, and have horribly chapped lips from "shushing" for so long. For crying out loud baby (literally).

Anyway. I'm just. so. tired.  But I finally figured out the slideshow! So that's your new stuff.  The new slideshow (there is also some recent artwork I did for a friend mixed in there).

Harper you are talking up a storm and we are having more conversations about details, for example; last night we talked extendedly about the fact that Zoie has nipples (you noticed while we were doing a diaper change), and then upon putting your hand on Zoie's chest said: "Pretty hot?"  (Referring to her skin temperature).  Oh so entertaining.  I also was tickled the other day in the middle of a tantrum when I told you "Oh Harper, hush hush", and you looked at me and screamed "NO HUSH HUSH!!!!".  I about died laughing inside, I didn't want you to think I wasn't validating your feelings. Your tantrums are definitely getting more dramatic and louder....nearing the Terrible Twos we are just a few weeks away I'm afraid.

Zoie I can see your little tooth! You are eating pears, bananas, apples, baby cereal, and avocados (still don't like the sweet potatoes).  And you are sleeping horribly. Again. Laughing at your sister all the time and you are sitting up really really well.  You are starting to like the stroller more (I've been walking twice a day with you girls) and we're able to make it a little longer each day.  Daddy even took you for a run yesterday and you fell asleep in the stroller for the first time. Hooray! Don't get any ideas though, I'm not running with you in the stroller in the middle of the night in order to get you to sleep. 

There are so many other things to say I'm sure....but they are all lost in the fog of my sleep deprived memory.  Just wanted to do a quick update & will try to post more later in the week. 
Enjoy the slideshow!

Your mama loves you girls :)

A Very Merry Half Birthday to Z!

We are having a rough nap today, so it's going to have to be a quick one! Hopefully I'll get a slide show of photos going at the top of the blog so you can see the new ones easier.
Five Things About You this week:
--Zoie you turned 6 months! Hooray! I can't believe a half of a year has gone by and you're already halfway to your first birthday.  What a whirlwind it has been, but you have turned out to be a sweet snuggly little girl.
--You are sitting up all by yourself without the boppy.  This has inspired Harper to sit and play with you much more often, and she thinks it's pretty funny that you reach for and grab your own toys now.
--You have cut your first tooth! We can't quite see it yet, but we can feel it, sharp as a little razor in your bottom left front.
--You started eating sweet potatoes this week, which you have completely hated thus far. Gagging and wincing with each bite.  You even tasted the 1/4 teaspoon that I mixed into your rice cereal. Little stinker...you're so particular! They are of course fresh sweet potatoes, baked and pureed right in my own kitchen....but you still don't like 'em....it's gonna take quite a few rounds of trying new foods I'm sure.
--You are almost sleeping better....I would say 6 nights out of 7 you get up every four hours to nurse and go back to sleep pretty easily. The 7th night your midnight demon comes out and we spend about 5 hours crying, shushing, rocking to get you to sleep, but to no avail.  You always fall asleep at 6am soundly and want to sleep until 9 or 10.  Again.....little stinker!

Harper you LOVE your new stroller and are so excited to have Zoie ride in it with you. You like to peek around the corner of your seat to see her back there.
-- You said "you're welcome" to me for the first time the other day after I said "thank you" for something. It was so cute! We are really working on getting you to use your manners.
-- You are obsessed with painting and art making right now. You want to be sitting at the desk most of the day coloring, using colored pencils, or painting. Daddy brought home a canvas board with a big painted number 3 on it that you and him have been painting together. It is a Jasper Johns tribute he says.....pretty cool looking right now I must say. We'll have to post pictures when you two are finished with it.
-- We went to story time at the library yesterday and you are starting to sing the songs and fingerplays with the librarian this week (we've gone about 5-6 times now). It is great to see you learn new songs and look around to see the other kids trying out the movements as well. You love to get your hand stamped at the end of the session and you are ready to run up to the front before she's done singing the good-bye song. Between the stamp on your hand and the coloring of your own hands with markers each time you're at the desk, I don't have any doubt that you'll be bugging us for permanent body art as soon as you're old enough. Just like I did to my parents. I'm in for it......
-- You discovered that you love raw zucchini this week! It's been great to give you something fresh and healthy, easy to cut up and you love to dip it in ranch. Well, you love to dip pretty much everything....but this is a great new addition to your "favorites".  You also have started drinking out of a "big girl" cup (without a sippy lid). We found the perfect little colored plastic cups at Ikea last weekend. I think they were $1.99 for a set of 6 cups. All perfectly sized for you! You are great about slowly taking sips and we have had very minimal spills thus far. You have picked up every other skill we've started with you pretty quickly, but this was a really easy one for you. Potty training however has been a different story....we're hoping that you'll be more interested SOON because your 2nd birthday is right around the corner. Whoa! Just a few more weeks and our baby girl is going to be 2!!!! How did that happen? We're looking forward to a celebration!

Smile girls, your mama loves you. 

Blue Crayola appetizer followed with an entree of peanut butter

I love it when we get messy - and I'm pretty sure you do too Harper.  The other day you colored your face while I sat next to you approving your behavior.  I told you, "if you want to color your face that's fine, but it means we will have a lot of scrubbing to do later".  You happily continued with your blue beard while I sat there and thought about the wonderful picture opportunity it would be.  What kind of crazy mom am I? Letting my child color all over her face so I can take a cute picture later? Well that part yes, but also, why not? We always need to ask that of a child. Why not let you experiment with how it felt, what it looked like, and even what it tasted like. As a result we got a lot of giggles out of the project and as you can see I got some great photos to save for your high school yearbook:

I have to be brief today because naps are not going very smoothly. Zoie you are teething, and although you haven't cut any actual teeth yet, you are chomping on everything like a little rabbit.  Five months has been great thus far and in just a few days you're going to be 6 months old. A whole half year has gone by. WHEW! Let's see.....if I had to sum it up into a list this week, I suppose I would save a bit of time.

Harper. Five Things About YOU:
--You rocked out at the Kirkland Library's story time for "ones" last week - you jumped and flapped your arms for 30 minutes and got all the kids around you going. It was hilarious. You have started to sing the songs with the rest of the group as well....so cute. You love the song "Open Shut Them".
--You discovered sidewalk chalk at the park the other day. Another mom was nice and shared with you, and you walked around and drew a little green chalky scribble on every hard surface you could find. Marking your toddler graffiti all over the benches, sidewalk, slides, rocks, you name it!
--You are fascinated with sticks and pick them up wherever you find them. You always make sure that there are sticks for mommy and daddy as well. You often offer them to other kids at the park, who look at you like, "hey, okay, maybe this is a good thing to play with....your mommy lets you play with this"?
--You have been very interested in cooking and always want to be involved with what I'm doing in the kitchen. You love to dump the measuring cups and stir, stir, stir.  You even baked cookies with daddy and sat on the counter almost the entire time.
--You have been such a fabulous sister with Zoie. When you're jumping on the bed you always demand to me "Soie jump"....because you want me to pretend to jump her on the bed with you.  I told you I was going to put Zoie on the floor with you to play and you said to me, "Boppy"....and you went and retrieved it and set it on the floor near your toys. (We place Zoie in the Boppy while she's sitting so it protects her if she falls over...it's a C shaped pillow). You always bring toys to her. And just recently when she's crying you've started telling her "Soie Soie....no trying (crying).....Soie pop Soie pop......no trying!" It's so funny to hear you demand her to stop, or demand her to play with a particular toy, and then take another out of her hands saying "LET TOE!!!" (LET GO!!) Ahhhhhh, sisters.

Zoie. Five Things About YOU:
-- You are ALMOST sitting up on your own. SO EXCITING! That makes a huge difference in your play time, and you are much happier sitting playing with Harper than laying on your back.  You are reaching for toys and putting everything you grab directly in your mouth. I have to be careful because Harper keeps trying to feed you goldfish crackers, which I don't doubt you will stick in your mouth.
--You have discovered the cat. Every time you see one of them you track them silently with your eyes and stop with curiosity when one of them comes near you. I remember this with Harper too, fascinated by the cats. In fact, I think Harper crawled for the first time in order to reach Satchmo.
-- You are becoming quite the little flirt, giving anyone who gives you eye contact a huge toothless grin. You're definitely a cute little conversation starter, with kids and adults alike. We've been calling you "Zoie Pop", it just seems to stick...and when we sing "Zoie Pop, Zoie Pop (to the tune of Lollipop) you grin at us and laugh. It's so funny!
--You are FINALLY starting to sleep a little better at night. You have about 5 good nights in a row, and then 1 or 2 horrible ones. BUT, aside from those 2 nights you are sleeping pretty soundly - getting up at 1:00 and 5:00 to nurse and sleeping until about 8 am.  Perfect as far as I'm concerned, and way, way, better than where we were just 4 weeks ago.  Those two horrible nights are still pretty horrible though, so we just need to work that last bit of midnight madness out of your system and get on a 7 day schedule. I can't complain though, like I said, better now than one month ago!
-- You are loving rice cereal and eat it every day at lunch with Harper. We can't wait to start some sweet potatoes and pears, I just have to remember to pick some up at the grocery store the next time we're there. Time to get down the mini food processor and the stacks of ice cube trays. Homemade baby food here we come, AGAIN!!

Your mama loves you two :)

Back to the blog.....

I'm back! I had to take a hiatus while my brand new computer was being "fixed", which seemed like an unbearably LONG time. 
Let's see....it's still raining here in Seattle so that's not really new news. The swans left Juanita Bay and flew to their summer nesting grounds (where, I don't know)...so our walks to the bay have been a little less uneventful. To be honest, I haven't really taken many walks because Zoie is getting too heavy to walk with in the pack, while pushing Harper in the stroller.  We really need a double stroller and then we will continue our walks on a more frequent basis.  Someday soon hopefully, and it'll be just in time for the weather to get warmer.

Harper your language has really taken off these past few weeks! You are using sentences more frequently, and you've increased your adjectives that you use to describe things.  You noticed that your skin is "hot" the other day when I was dressing you - after putting your hands on your bare belly you looked at me with question in your eyebrows and said, "hot?" "belly hot?".  I told you that you didn't need your pacifier one day and I took it and put it in my pocket.  You said "no mama!", "I neet it.....for ma mouf".  Not only do you want it, but you need it for your mouth! So astute you are. We have been playing on the floor with the farm house a lot, and you have taken to feeding all of the animals & your bears and dolls with a small spoon that you "cook" with (I've given you recycled yogurt, juice, and butter containers).  You always offer Zoie a taste too, which is so cute.  You also put your shoes on for the first time all by yourself the other day! I was so excited for you, and we clapped and cheered and did a little dance.  You were so proud of yourself, I just love seeing the smile on your face when you know you've accomplished something big. 

Zoie.... you're five months already! I remember 5 months being a great month with Harper, so much changes and grows during this particular month for some reason.  You've started moving your arms and hands with aim and purpose, always reaching and grasping for things to feel and then put in your mouth.  You are SUCH A HAPPY BABY (most days) and you laugh at your sister and me all day long.  You love the "excer-saucer" that you can stand/sit in and cruise around a circle of toys on your own.  You squeal and talk and coo, it is truly hilarious to watch your eyes "as big as saucers" every time something makes noise or moves. You are SO close to rolling over from your back to your tummy, but not quite as of today. I'll bet that by the end of the month you'll be rolling all over the place.  You are also almost able to sit up on your own, not quite, but also very, very close. We've started feeding you rice cereal every day which you are starting to like quite a bit.  Harper also likes your feeding time, as she comes over and sneaks bites of your baby gruel, which she approves and shakes her head "yeah" after each bite. Crazy girl.  Yesterday she wanted to jump on the bed and then shouted at me "Soie, Soie!" and insisted that I put you up on the bed to "jump" with her.  (I hold you under your arms and pretend to jump you on the bed).....Harper then runs out to the living room, demands music, and starts to dance, and then repeats "Soie, Soie!" because she wants you to dance with her.  I do the same thing, pretend to dance you around the living room, both of you cracking up and Harper jumping and then landing on the floor on her butt. You have the widest toothless grin on your face, reaching out to hold Harper's hand and her grabbing yours in return.  It gave me the best vision of about 6-7 months from now, when you will be able to walk and dance around the living room with her.  Sisters giggling and playing together. I can't wait to see it! But I know I need to enjoy my baby snuggles with you while you are still so soft and tiny. I love kissing your little cheeks and neck just to get you to giggle.  Such a sweet sound those baby laughs so hearty and uninhibited. 

Alright, nap time is just about over...so I'm signing off so I can enjoy my last few minutes of silence with a good book. 

Your mama loves you two. 

It's a new week, and we started off with a bunch of new words and phrases. On Monday morning you said "Ahhh blet you! Ahhh blet you!" when I sneezed twice.  It took me a second, but I quickly realized that you said "Bless you! Bless you!" Harper, it's definitely the first time that you've said that. You usually just say "Achoo! Achoo!".  You came out of your bedroom and immediately went to your wooden name puzzle on the coffee table.  The pieces were all over the table, and you quickly grabbed the first one "p", told me it was a "p", and put it in the right spot.  You continued on telling me all the letters, and fumbling them into their correct places until "Harper" was spelled out.  SO PROUD! You have been playing with this puzzle for about 8 months, and always need help fitting the pieces into the holes until that moment. You have known the names of the letters for quite a long time though, but I am still very excited for you anyway, puzzles are quite the accomplishment.

I decided this week that we were going to try some "scheduled" events a few days to try something new. We went to the indoor playground at North Kirkland Community Center on Tuesday.  It was really just a large room with a bunch of push cars, balls, and plastic kitchens to play with. One little tiny backyard plastic slide, but you both enjoyed it anyway. Harper you took a while to get comfortable in the room with the other kids, but you warmed up and played with pretty much everything. Zoie was in the wrap on my chest and watched all the other kids with wide eyes. All the moms/nannies were lined up in chairs against the far wall either talking or playing on their smart phones.  There was one other mom in the middle of the room playing with her kid, and then there were about 4 other grandmas there, and they were all out playing with their grand kids. There was one dad there who sat down periodically, but interacted with the two little girls he was with.   It was interesting to see the other moms/nannies just relaxing/chatting/texting and letting their kids cry for them. I didn't realize that this phenomenon that I'd been hearing about (the "Eastside" mommy/nanny mentality), actually happened. Oh well. All the children were fine in the end, and people can play with, or not play with their children as they please, as long as their kids aren't hurt, and they aren't hurting my kid.

Today was also new. We went to the Kirkland library for "Ones Story Time", which was really fun and full of other kids.  While we were waiting outside in the cold sunshine we met another little girl named Eden and her mommy Veronica. Eden was 18 months and sparked your smile and sense of camaraderie.  After a few minutes of the moms chatting, you two were romping across the lawn and chasing each other around the statue.  Story time included a lot of singing and a few stories, and it was a nice little change from our usual morning madness. I had planned for Zoie to sleep in the pack during this time, but it didn't work out, and my hands were full with her most of the time.  I hope that next week we can try and attend again, and I'll have to strategize a little better about what to do with Zoie so that I can spend that 30 minutes more devoted to Harper.  It's SO difficult trying to figure out how to enjoy quality time with each of you one-on-one without the other one needing my attention too! I still haven't figured this out, four months into it, but I know that eventually I will, and it will just get easier at the same time.

Alright, both of you are napping really well today. So I'm going to sign off and find something productive to do before my "me" time is over. It's daddy's birthday this weekend, so I have some crafty prep work to do.......

Your mama loves you girls!
 

                                           (Zoie - 4 months)

The End of an Era.

I have been thinking over and over and over in my head for the last 26 or so hours the words that were said to me yesterday, and how I am going to digest those words. And now, the next day (and now the NEXT, because it's now even later), I am still processing the conversation, and how to deal with the overwhelming feeling of loss that it has bestowed upon me.  I had a meeting yesterday morning (Tuesday) with my supervisor to discuss my interview, and in the end, I did not get the director job. I was told that I'm "not the right fit for West Campus", when it's a place I have called my second home for almost a decade.  I was told that my "bucket was empty", when talking about the faculty members, and their faith and trust in me, because I've been on maternity leave for 4 months. I was told that I was being saved from the panel interview because the teachers and parents would reject me against the other candidates. This is the part I'm most upset about, not getting a panel interview.  I made it to the panel in at least two other director interviews, but I couldn't make a panel interview at my own campus? So many other depressing things were said, I don't care to document all of it. I was even asked, "Do you even really WANT to be the director at West Campus"? Really? I thought that I had made that part obvious by continuing all the training, sticking it out through thick and thin, verbally and physically expressing my devotion to the place (and truly meaning every minute of it), remaining positive when all else fell bleak, and sparking that passion amongst others, by living and breathing life at West Campus.

I walked away shocked, and I still sit here shocked.

I am devastated. I am sad. I am angry. I am hurt. I am not a director, and I am no longer an assistant director. I no longer have a money earning career, as I have for the past 9 years. I no longer have a place to call my second home every day, with people whom I "grew up" with, and whom were helping to raise my children, and whom I call my family.The challenge that I accepted years ago, to succeed within the company and move up to an administrative level has certainly given me many opportunities and lessons along the way. But I now feel like that challenge has commenced, it has lapsed as I have interviewed many times for a director position and continually walk away empty handed. If West Campus wasn't the "right fit" for me, after I have been there for nearly a decade, then I do not know where the "right fit" is.  I will dearly miss going to work at West Campus every day, and I will miss even more the people who make West Campus what it is.

There is one thing to be happy about though. Well, maybe two. That one thing is you girls. That now I get to be a stay-at-home mom for a while. The second thing is that losing this job will be the clear and open door for us to move back to California as soon as your daddy's contract is up this summer. Finally a break in Seattle life that will give us an opportunity to go home.

What I do have are two beautiful daughters, with whom I am now able to stay home with everyday. I will be able to help you grow and learn to become the important little people that you are. I know that I am so fortunate to have this opportunity presented to me, and with time I will adjust to this new path that life has carved out for me. For US, this new path that life has carved for US. We will wake up every morning and relish in spending the day together, experiencing life through the eyes of a toddler (and an infant). We will laugh endlessly, and we will teach each other about the most important details in life. We will encounter adventures in the uncharted waters that each day will bring, and I will do my very best to make those adventures incredible. 

We walked this morning (Thursday) to see the ducks, and when we arrived on the bridge we were instead met with three spectacular swans swimming in the bay. It was a sign that mother nature sent to remind me of the beauty that I get to experience each day now that I can be truly devoted to you girls. The three of us, floating along, waiting for the next big thing to come out of the water. (Hopefully that wasn't a pun related to pooping in the bathtub).  Zoie was asleep and cozy warm against my chest, so I put away the camera and held your cold little fingers in my hand Harper. The three of us stood there together and watched the swans swim out to broader waters, and then in again to the bay.  There were all sorts of birds singing and ducks calling behind us in the marsh.  We talked about where ducks go to sleep in the grass, and how they tuck their heads into their feathers. A nice old couple came up on the walkway to enjoy the view with us, and they had a cute little dog named "Marley". Harper, you generally don't like dogs very much (except Oscar), but you were curious about Marley's leash and how it was attached to him.  They were nice people and were so happy to be out enjoying the cold sunshine, just as we were ourselves. 

On our walk home, a red tailed hawk swooped down from the trees and circled around right in front of us.  Harper, you said "airplane!!"" "bird?"" "airplane!!"" "bird!!!" Your confusion during the event made me laugh, and at the same time cry over my pride for your intelligence.  It was such a surprise to see it right in front of us, and it was of course gorgeous. I don't think I've ever seen a hawk fly that close to me before. Yet another sign from Mother Nature that everything is gonna be alright.

Zoie, you're AWAKE! Gotta go get some cuddles. 

Your mama loves you girls.

Double Pigtails

I am officially unemployed. My leave of absence for maternity ended yesterday, and as of today I will be leaving my position as assistant director. We just cannot find child care that we can afford, so won't be able to merit going back to work.  I would actually have to pay BH about $50 a month in child care in order to return to my old job. Anybody who PAYS an employer to allow them to come to work every day and be a stellar employee is insane.  There is a small chance that I may be able to return to BH, and that is if the director interview pans out and I'll be given a chance to interview in the 2nd round in front of the panel of teachers & parents. Having worked there for 9 years, I certainly have established quality relationships with almost all of the families, and all of the faculty members.  A panel interview would be highly in my advantage, if they will just give me that opportunity. I'm sure they will, I just have to be patient. 

As for now though, it feels really depressing to have to announce that I won't be returning to my coveted position after all this time.  I can tell you that I feel sad and even a bit lonely, because my job, for the entirety of my life in Seattle, has been my lifeblood.  I saw those co-workers everyday for more hours than I saw Dave. Spent more time training, laughing, and teaching with those people, than I spent with my own college roommates. In fact, I have known those co-workers much longer than I ever lived with any roommates besides Dave. It's strange to feel like they won't be a part of my daily "family life" anymore.  A big part of me is relieved that I won't have to deal with the drama that comes with working with 30 other women, but an even bigger part of me is just plain sad. 

I have to look at this little person sitting next to me right now, who is watching Elmo attentively (bad mommy!), and trying to climb into my lap while I'm typing and your eyes are still glued to the TV screen. My sadness about my career immediately melts away a bit as your warm polar fleece pajama feet are wiggling about next to me.  We don't have cable, and you've never actually been exposed to real TV, but we do own a few Elmo videos, which you are totally infatuated with. Harper, I think one of your first real words was actually "Elmo". Zoie is taking an early nap this morning because she got up really early (around 7:30), so I thought I would take this break sponsored by Elmo, to get a little extra blogging time in.

This weekend was the first time you tried out the double pig tails Harper. It was just too cute, your daddy and I left them in all afternoon, and snapped as many pictures as we could.  Both of us said that they actually made you look like a little girl (your hair is still so short, we've never cut it), you're nearing two, and people still think you're a little boy all the time because of your short hair. It's ridiculous! Pink sparkly shoes and purple jacket, and people still think that you're a little boy.  Those pigtails should help you out though. 

Harper, you've been so independent these last few weeks.  You say "Harpy do eet" all the time, (Harper do it), telling us that you would rather do something yourself then have us help you. Today at lunch you were so flustered because you had a string of cheese on your plate and you wanted it in the trash can, not anywhere near your plate. You yelled "Harpy do eet!" at me about ten times, while I was nursing, (I kept telling you to wait a minute until I could help you get out of the high chair), until I finally just unlatched Zoie and came to get the pesky string from you. So persistent you little Taurus! I'm glad to know that you are wanting to do things on your own though, and sadly, this is the beginning of you wanting no help from me. I'm not ready for you to grow up this fast!

Zoie, when I was giving you a bath last night you squealed over and over again when I dribbled water over your feet. Kicking and splashing, you are quite the water lover.  Harper definitely didn't like the bath as much as you do (until she got older and could play in the water more). You coo and babble to me all the time these days, but you're super vocal when you're in the bath.  I just put your little baby bathtub in the kitchen sink and bathe you there, it's so much easier to stand up rather than lean over the tub to reach your squirmy little body. I use the sprayer attachment on the nozzle to rinse you off, which you absolutely love.  It's pretty neat to watch your face light up when you hear the water turn on. I have no doubt that you won't be a little "fish" as you get older. Perhaps you'll even be a swimmer like your daddy was.  I'm sure that he's dying to get both of you in a pool to teach you how to swim.  I keep suggesting that Harper would love swimming lessons, and he always tells me that he can teach you girls how to swim this summer when we can use the pool in our complex. We'll just have to see if we stay in WA long enough to enjoy that pool in a few months.  I am ready to move home to CA, but that's a whole different blog.

Alright well, I don't think I had a full five things today - but Zoie, you are not napping very soundly today, so I need to go spend some quality time bouncing you back to sleep. It's only Monday, we have the whole week ahead of us.

Smile girls, your mama loves you.

Marker prohibition and sleep exhaustion.

Zoie, you're 4 months old already! What happened! "Time flies" blah, blah, but really, 4 months have passed since you were born? That's crazy! Your first 100 days has finally come and gone, and in the beginning I thought it would never arrive.  Another parent at school (has three children all 18 months apart), told me that the first 100 days were the most difficult, and after that, it would only get easier. She was right! Our days are definitely getting smoother, and you are the happiest baby 5 out of 7 days.  I give you the other two to just get extra cuddling time, and that's certainly fine with me. Sleeping at night however, is not your forte. 

You still haven't learned to be comfortable at night, and some nights you wake up every 10 or 15 minutes, just screaming. It is horrible to feel like I can't comfort you, and we have tried EVERYTHING. We swaddle, we shush, we rock, we bounce, we walk, we hum, we turn on the noise machine, we try your side, your tummy, your back, upright on my chest, we swing, we sway, we sing, we un-swaddle, we do nothing, we nurse and nurse and nurse, and then FINALLY....I'll get you to sleep. Sound asleep, I'll lay you in your basket (long moses basket intended for sleeping infants), and you'll sleep soundly for about 10 minutes, just enough for me to start falling asleep again, and then BAM! You're AWAKE, SCREAMING!  AHHHHHH! And then we do it all over again, and again, and again, until you finally stay asleep. You'll sleep for about 2 hours, and then you're up, ready to start the whole process again. Poor baby, I wish I knew the answer to this madness. I wish I had the key to your sleep secret. Someday my little Zozo, someday soon we MUST FIGURE THIS OUT.  On Sunday, I got out of bed 16 times, and then finally put you in bed next to me at about 4 am.  That's just not healthy for neither you nor I, so I am seeking help from any mom out there, and all kinds of book suggestions.  Thank goodness you are still sleeping in our room, so you're not waking your sister, although she still wakes up once or twice in the  night too. 

And here I am up late at night blogging, when I should be catching up on some much needed sleep. Writing this stuff down will be worth it though, in the long run I'll feel better.

So five things huh, I'm pretty tired, but let's see.  The sleep thing can definitely be one of them. Harper, tonight when I went to school to pick you up, you ran up to me and Zoie (in her car seat), and when I placed Z down on the floor you leaned in and kissed her on the forehead and said "Hhhhhiiii baby Sooooie".  When you kiss her (and any other time you kiss anything) you say "Mmmmmmmmm-Ah" and give smack. You warm up the letter M, I absolutely love it.  That's how I get my kisses too, "Mmmmmmmmm-ah"!  So there's number 2. 

Three:  When we went for our walk on Monday down to the bridge to see the ducks, you were wandering your fingers over some of the signs posted on the wooden fencing.  I asked you to find the H on the "NO FISHING" sign, and sure enough, you pointed right at it.  Then I asked you to find the O and sure enough you know that one too. Darn SMART girl you are at 21 months old. Such a proud proud proud mama!  

Four: Harper, you are banned from using markers.  You successfully colored all over the desk, chair, Zoie's play mat and hanging toys, and seemed to ignore the giant piece of paper I gave you. I was nursing Zoie while you did this just behind my shoulder. You little stinker. Later on in the morning  I couldn't figure out why Zoie's hands had blue on them, and some on her shirt even.  You however, you were covered in marker, so I didn't question that. But Zoie? THEN, I found it. On the toys hanging from her little gym. Thank goodness for Crayola washable markers, almost all of it came right out. And I definitely got a laugh out of it, and definitely learned that I can't trust you with art supplies just yet.  Thank goodness it's not on the walls of the new apartment we just moved in to.   

Five: I actually considered other child care options this week, and scheduled a few tours of them next week.  It's ridiculous to think that I can't afford child care for both of you, and that I am going to have to resign from my job because I can't seem to afford any child care, be it BH or other private or home situation.  I just can't believe that I have been with a company 9 years, am in my 30's, and am not netting enough income to pay for child care for two kids. Even with their employee discount.  Regardless, a promotion would certainly be the perfect thing, and so I have applied and starting interviewing for the Director position at the school that I've been at for the past 9 years. The timing of this position opening right now is impeccable. This could really be it.  My big chance to finally run my own program, and in an environment and with teachers whom I know and respect dearly.  This could really be the right opportunity in my career right now, BUT, the big question is.......will they offer me enough money? Will the respect that I need from my superiors truly come to light, or will they fail to provide me with a career that I can remain in with them? And most importantly, will I get through the panel interview next week and actually get an offer? Will I actually end my leave of absence (maternity) next week (expires on the 6th...) because I can't afford child care? Will my career be over?

And with those questions, I shall sign off. I good five things to be happy about remembering. 

Your mama loves you little peanuts.

A diarrhea in the bathtub kinda week

Time goes so quickly when you have two sick kiddos.  Every day last week I thought, damn, I really need to go write that down....but I was too busy changing diapers and cleaning the bathtub. Harper, you took more baths last week than you take in  a regular month. You had so much diarrhea, I had the washer and dryer running all day every day.  And for the first time in my history of working with children, I dealt with diarrhea in the bathtub. I posted a question on Facebook that asked parents what their first move, and words out of their mouth would be if this happened to them. I got some pretty hilarious answers.  It's so hard not to cuss profanely when you see a bright green cloud emerge from under your toddler's legs while she's sitting in the bath water. Not cussing out of anger of course, just cussing out of sheer shock and unknowingness. "What do I do first?" you think.  SO "fantastic" as one of my commentors wrote.  Regardless though, we made it through the week just as we always do. Zoie you did catch the same bug as Harper, but thank goodness didn't get it as badly. You also have aquired another cold, which is making you all snorty and sniffly.  Poor babies!

Harper, this week you are trying SO many new words out. My favorite was "ta tee ah" (tortilla), and still is "apt el sa" (applesauce).  I caught you singing the ABC's while you were playing with the letters on the fridge door.  Hearing you start to sing is absolutely heart warming, it makes me smile every time. You especially like the end of the alphabet...."dubba you, ets, y, see. Now no ma AC's, net won sin meeeeeeeeeee" (W,X,Y and Z. Now I know my ABC's next time won't you sing with me).  We finally have you singing to Zoie, and the other morning I tried so hard to catch you on film while you were pretending to feed Zoie with your cup and spoon.  She was laying on the floor playing with toys, and you came and sat right next to her and offered her some of your imaginary food.  It was the most exciting, heart warming, fulfilling moment to see you initiate play with your baby sister, and offer to share something with her.  You are the best big sister, and we know that as you two age, you will be inseparable. It will be awesome to have a sister, and it's something I never had. I have a brother, your Uncle Ben. And I have my best friend Nora (Auntie Nora to you), because we have always called each other sisters, even though by blood we are not related, just best friends since preschool. Your daddy has a sister, your Auntie Dawn. I'm looking forward to the years when I can learn new things about sisterhood from you two, Harper and Zoie.

 I can't even describe the emotions that I feel when I see you two doing wonderful things, it's a love that I have never felt before, not for anyone else. I'm sure that your daddy feels the same way about you. When you meet your baby for the first time, you have this sensation of love, protection, well being, laughter, so many feelings all at once. Ultimately though, all of those feelings boil down to one of love and pride for your little being. Love and pride that I have never experienced on this level before. It makes your chest warm and your belly muscles ache, it makes my lips curve upward in a smile every single time.  Mothers around the world know what I'm talking about, and I'm SURE fathers do too.  It is a feeling, a "knowing" that is unlike anything else. Someday I hope that you will be able to enjoy this happiness with your own children as well.

Zoie, you are starting to roll over! It's very exciting to see you push yourself from your tummy on to your back, but at the same time this little voice in the back of my head says "oh no, she's mobile...." I can't wait to see you grow over the next year, I remember very clearly Harper's first year (it was just last year), and I know we have lots of really exciting milestones coming up. At the same time though, I want you to stop growing and stay my tiny little precious newborn. Skin so soft you can't help but kiss it. A little giggle so cute, I can't help but tickle you (Harper was nowhere near that ticklish as an infant).  You are truly a happy baby, despite the fact that I can't devote as much time as I'd like to for one-on-one interactions with you. We are just so busy with both of you!

17 months apart......you are keeping us on our toes, but growing into little people SO FAST.

Your mama loves you.

Time flies

My First Blog About You Two/Three

Wow. I can't believe that I've never blogged before. Being someone who likes to talk, and write (more so in my high school/college days), I should have picked up on this sooner. 
I decided that I really want to keep a journal of some sorts, now that I'm a mommy, and am supposed to be more settled in my life. But life doesn't feel settled at all right now. We have so much to be thankful for this day, but also so much turmoil in our lives.  I want to be able to keep track of all of my wonderful memories of this time in our lives/ my life really, and I want to be able to share it with you when you're older. I want to be able to share it with our family and friends, maybe sometimes, if not all the time. You, Harper and Zoie, are my two beautiful daughters, and I would regret not writing down these incredible memories of your infancy, and childhoods.  Let's see, today is 1/20/2011, so Harper, you are 20 months, and Zoie you are 3 months.  Harper, I wish that I would have started this the day you were born, but now that Zoie is here too, it's easy to recall the things that you did as a baby.

I've titled my blog "Five Things About You", becuase I think that is an awesome way to look back on our crazy days.  I recently saw a post from a friend about something about 5 Things that make you happy each day, but I lost track of it, and couldn't get in to the link to read about the original author. So I'm using that idea as my foundation.  Five is first of all my favorite number, and I think that looking back on each day, no matter how wonderful, crazy, miserable, incredible, or lazy, I want to think of five things about each of you that day that really stuck out in my head. Sometimes your daddy, Dave, gets to be included too.  And as much as I want to remain positive, I also want to be able to include "things" of everyday life, whether they be happy, or sad, becuase life is important enough to remember "as is".....

In the past month or so, there have been so many "things", so I'm going to of course back track at times, and also include memories....My time at the computer, will of course be limited to nap times, and after bed times, so I may get quickly interrupted or distracted and have to bolt. But that is the truth of this journal, and I hope that we all get to enjoy it whether that be today in this moment, or twenty years from now.  Speaking of waking children, Harper, I can hear you chanting to me through the monitor right now....."Mommy, mommy, paci, paci, mommy, hee hee, paci, paci".  I may have a few more minutes before I need to go in and rescue you from the depths of your afternoon nap. 

Yes, and the tense.  I'm going to try to keep this in the tense that I'm speaking to you, my daughters, and maybe you too Dave.  So remind me if I leave this form.

Well...I'm going to post, and see what it looks like. I'll add more pics and maybe more journal tonight. Yay! I'm excited :) Smile girls, your mama loves you.